“The 9 scariest words for any college fan to hear are ‘I’m Ted Cruz and I am coming to your game,'” Kelly said in a news release.
HARRIS COUNTY, Texas — Charles Kuffner, a Harris County Democratic precinct chair, and his ‘buddy,’ fellow Democratic precinct chair Bill Kelly, have had enough.
“After long discussions and one too many ‘Oh my God he did it again’ situations, we have decided to take action on one of the more pressing matters that we face at this time,” Kuffner wrote on his blog, Off the Kuff.
That pressing matter? The superstition that Sen. Ted Cruz is a bad luck charm at sporting events.
Kuffner and Kelly have proposed a resolution that they say would ban Cruz from attending any college sports playoff game.
In the drafted resolution, the two cite several sporting events the senator has attended in which the team he was rooting for lost, including the following:
- The University of Houston Cougars’ loss to the University of Florida in the 2025 NCAA Basketball Tournament title game
- The University of Texas Longhorns’ loss to the University of Washington in the 2024 Sugar Bowl
- Texas Tech University’s loss to the University of Virginia in the 2019 NCAA Basketball Tournament
The resolution also claims Cruz has a combined record of 1-8 when in attendance for the Texas Longhorns, Baylor Bears, and Texas A&M Aggies football teams.
“Sports bettors are now 15-2 since 2017 when betting the money line against teams Ted Cruz shows up to support in person, where an individual would have profited $2,344 if they placed a $100 bet on each game,” the resolution reads.
“The 9 scariest words for any college fan to hear are ‘I’m Ted Cruz and I am coming to your game,'” Kelly said in a news release.
Here’s what the resolution says it would do:
“Therefore be it resolved that the Harris County Democratic Party – who proudly supports colleges across the State of Texas – will work with all partners to keep Ted Cruz away from attending college playoff sporting events in person. We further urge him to spend quality time with his dog Snowflake, or share a couch with JD Vance, or work on his basketball skills – or do anything other than attend a college playoff game in person.”
Kuffner ended his blog post on the resolution acknowledging the unseriousness of the proposal.
“And look, silliness aside, a little mockery is a good tool to have in your belt for when it is needed,” Kuffner wrote.
